I’m Full

by sandihester

I don’t have time to be writing a post right now – but I must – I must brag and show off my God. Ever been overflowing and you didn’t have time to boast about Him, but some how you HAD to make time because above all the important things the day calls me to do, boasting in Him must come first.

I’m full. Full of turkey and ham – well not really because I’m a vegetarian, but full from all the things that go with turkey and ham – like side dishes and family. Yes, I’m full from those things, but I’m talking about a different kind of fullness. The full I’m feeling is what Jesus spoke of in John 10:10 “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” I’ve been overflowing in His fullness for several weeks now. I hope to stay here, but I’m sure I won’t – the pull of this world and selfishness will certainly pull me back out of His fullness at some point – it always does. But for now I will cherish the fullness of the life He’s come to give me. I can pin point when the fullness started – it was the week I said yes to go volunteer with the Alzheimer’s patients. For some reason God’s word catches me off guard sometimes when it actually proves true. Jesus said in losing your life you’ll find it – it’s so true. I can’t stop thinking about, praying for, and loving those forgot men and women. Jesus has seared them on my soul. It’s amazing how giving up one morning for some forgotten people can place you in the fullness of God’s presence, but it does and it has for me and Gayle. We’re seeing God do some amazing things with these people. His presence is so real and thick there – I long to get back to it (and them) each week.

Last week we ended our time with them circled around the table holding hands and we prayed. I was a little nervous about what the workers would think or say but the two that were down there with us jumped in the circle and grabbed hands and bowed their heads right along with us – thank you Lord! I’m not sure how to describe the countenance on the faces in that room when we lifted our heads – it was sweet and there was peace. I’m quite sure it was a sweet fragrance rising and pleasing to the Lord. One funny… when Gayle and I were leaving, sweet Marion followed us to the door – the locked door that you need a code to get through. She had been quite unsettled that day – she was trying to find her son and needed a ride “home” to Pennsylvania. She came up to us as we were leaving and asked if we were going through “that door”. She then asked us if she could “escape” with us 🙂 – we told her we would get in a lot of trouble if we let her go through the door with us. I can’t remember her exact words but they were something to the effect that she understood and that it was ok she would just try again another day. She was the sweetest and kindest escape artist you’ve ever met!

I’m full from other things as well.  I look around at other things in my life that would normally have me unhappy and discontent. The house situation is one of those things. We’re still in our rental. Some people won’t understand this and others will – being here would normally make me unhappy. I’m a nester, a decorator, and a home body. I’ve been asking for God’s patience in waiting on Him to find us a more permanent home and guess what – He’s giving me His patience AND contentment…more fullness. When our flesh is not given what it wants and it’s not satisfied – we can do one of two things: 1. give in to our flesh and be unhappy, spoiled, and discontent or 2. we can find joy in denying our flesh and lean into Jesus and find our joy and contentment in Him. This is a sweet place to be.

There’s several other things I could mention where I’m finding His fullness. He is so good, so sweet to me, and I’m so undeserving of His gracious kindness. I am thankful this holiday season… and full.

I want to thank Jay Hoth for inspiring me with his photography and for letting me paint from some of his photographs. This painting and the last painting were painted using his photos as references. Please look past the many typos I’m sure are here – my man (proofer) is in his busy season at work.